Gadgets.

Sometimes the quick advancements of technology frustrate me. When you’re walking out of the front door of a store with a new phone, computer, MP3 player, television, or any other electronic gadget, retailers are already loading in the newer and better devices in the back. Luckily, being a part of “Generation Y” or “The Millennials” gives people like me a higher adaptability due to our affinity for the new goods. My parents and most “baby boomers” however, are getting left behind in the technological world. All they want is a cell phone that can be used for talking and texting (for the more advanced), and they hold on to it until the buttons fall off. We millennials, are more likely to do heavy research on a new phone, weigh the pros and cons about the features, bells, and whistles, and then “commit” to a new two-year contract.

Then what happens? A few weeks or months later, we see something new or different and then start to second (or third or fourth) guess our decision figuring out how much or how long it would take to get out of our contract.

Ah yes. The notion for my way, right away. The mentality of in-demand on-demand to cover up the buyer’s remorse.

Guys.

Two years ago I sat next to an elderly couple on an airplane. They spoke civilly and were very considerate towards each other  in their actions. After seeing such appropriate display of affection, I mustered up the courage to speak, and it went something like this.

Me: Excuse me, I hope you don’t mind me asking…uhh…’How long have you been married?”

Husband: Well it’s been 43 years.

Me: Wow. Do you have any advice for people my age on how to sustain a marriage for so long?

Wife: Well you have to communicate  and talk things through.

Husband: You find your mate, make a decision, and commit to her no matter how hard things get. There will be hard times, but stick with it…

Being in my late 20′s, the talk of marriage isn’t far from my lips. The same goes for some of my guy friends. We talk about the concept of marriage and our current bf/gf relationships that we’re in (but not IN-in as if we’re already married). We have problems and issues with girlfriends and whether or not the relationships are worth keeping. After all, we didn’t sign a contract right?

My fear is that we become so instinctive to dispose of what we want when we want, that we treat our relationships the same way. Women are obviously worth more than any material item to purchase, and we should choose wisely who we want to commit to and do just that: make a sound decision and stick with it. No matter what you decide, there will always be something or someone out there with different features, bells, whistles, hairstyle, skin, talent, etc. There will be malfunctions and misunderstandings. These things are inevitable. Does that give us the right to run? Yes? No? Maybe? I’m curious to know what others think.

I know there are legitimate and healthy reasons for divorce and separation, and in no way am I saying that all relationships can be transformed into rainbows and butterflies. That’s just ignorant. Moreover, even if bad decisions were made either to begin or end the relationship, I believe God can work all things for the better somehow some way.

Again, I’m reminded about that elderly couple on the airplane who signed that contract and committed to each other for life despite their “buttons falling off” for the past 43 years. They saw value in each other decades ago and didn’t let go of that no matter how the times changed. Nowadays we get so short-sighted due to the influx of immediate options out there, the thought of anything lasting more than two years or more scares us. As for me and any contract I sign or commitment I make, I just want to be faithful to the end. I hope others can agree with me. Let’s help keep each other accountable.

Here’s one of my favorite songs and lyrics about this subject by hip-hop artist, Common:

Lyrics:

Faithful to the end
(We got to be)
Faithful to the end
(I want to be)
Faithful to the end
I’m like her
Very best friend

Yes, this for the people … God moves

I was rolling around, in my mind it occurred
What if God was a Her?
Would I treat her the same?
Would I still be runnin’ game on Her?
In what type of ways would I want Her?
Would I want her for her mind
Or her heavnly body
Couldn’t be out here bogus
With someone so godly
If I was wit her would I still be wantin’ my ex
The lies, the greed, the weed, the sex
Wouldn’t be ashamed to give Her part of my check
Wearing a cross, I mean Her heart on my neck
Her I would refelct
On the streets of the Chi
Ride with her. cause I know for me, she’d die
Though good and bad
Call on her like I’m chirpin Her
Couldn’t be jealous
Cause other brothers worship Her
Walk this Earth for Her
Glory I’m grateful to be in Her presence
I try to stay faithful

Faithful to the end
Faithful to the end
Faithful to the end
I’m like her
Very best friend

He worked with her
She was this lady’s best friend.
Even if they do try, some ladies test men
And this was a test that was bigger than him.
Some believe it’s the nature that’s givin him in
He had a good gig, a wife, a kid, a decent home.
One reason or another, couldn’t find peace at home
She asked, “Why do men always have to stray?”
He said, “I’m bad, but not as bad as Eric Benet.”
I used to take them out to eat
But they weren’t really eatin’
Might have got a little head
But I wadn’t really cheatin’
It’s hard when your lady don’t believe what you sayin
What you did in the past you gotta live with today
She asked if they could spend the night together
He thought and said, “I’m tryin’ to get my life together.”
Went home to his lady
And these were his confessions
“Baby, you a blessin’ and my best friend.”

Faithful to the end
Faithful to the end
Faithful to the end
I’m like her
Very best friend

It’s the details

…and the harmony

…that put us on top of the world.

Fact has it that there is a not-so-secret society among us, a society that is not exclusive, and everyone wants in. Within this group, people have a sense of greatness along with their peers across the globe whom they have never met. I’m not referring to the whispered conspiracies of the free masons or illuminati. The members of this not-so-secret society are both poor and wealthy, and they have resources for each other that can pull each other through tight binds, criticism, and adversity; resources like hope, encouragement, empathy, laughter, tears, and heck…money too. What is the main component that ties these people together? Appreciation…for life, each other, and even God. This appreciation drives joy (and not just happiness) through the roads of their lives. It also fuels the hope for each day they start and finish.

Another featured trait among these people is their attention to effort and detail, the little enhancements that can make life grand. As depicted above, adding a little extra zest to some stock sparkling cider turns a table of “commoners” into a banquet of kings and queens. Does that imply looking down upon others? By no means. While I can try to articulate it in my own words, I believe Coldplay does it so much better with theirs:

People moving all the time inside a perfect straight line
Don’t you wanna curve away?
It’s such it’s such a perfect day, it’s such a perfect day

Strawberry Swing by Coldplay

Whether you’re escaping, conquering, laughing, or crying, there are others right there along with you. Together we push forward, putting in the effort to survive these harsh winters and dry seasons. Globally, we’re non-exclusive, and we differentiate ourselves for the better by being present and encouraging each other. We don’t need all of the money and power in the world to be at the top. We’re on top of the world because of God and each other. We are blessed, “strawberry swingin’” with world-class status.

Now raise your glasses!

Almost all of it sounds the same. Almost none of it is fruitful. 

or watch it on Vimeo in full resolution.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a hater. It’s just that “I need good moral fiber for a spiritual bowel movement.”

Five major influences of my upbringing and ongoing:

1. My parents
2. Mr. Rogers
3. Church
4. School
5. Hip-hop culture

The first four may be up there for obvious reasons, but hip-hop culture has exposed me to elements of expression such as  rhyming, dancing, and even fashion, all of which I still participate in today. When I was 4 years-old, Run DMC was on Reading Rainbow rapping and telling kids how cool it is to read and learn.  I wanted to be like them.

Hip-Hop Influence

KANYE WEST:

The College Dropout (2004)

In 2003, I heard Kanye West’s first single as a rapper Through the Wire. There was something about the lyrics and conviction of the song that made me believe that he was far above what was currently popular and different from anything I have ever heard (probably because he did the whole song with his jaw wired shut).

The next two singles All Falls Down and Jesus Walks from his first album The College Dropout showed transparency and even a bold belief in Jesus. I listened to the rest of the album and officially became a fan.

Throughout the years Kanye found himself in political, musical, and other public controversy. His music evolved, and I loved it. His attitude changed, and it made me grind my teeth or sigh deeply.

Today, I don’t know what to think about Mr. West. He recently cancelled a huge tour this past Fall 2009 as he explained that he needed to do some “soul searching.”

We’re at war with terrorism, racism, and most of all, we’re at war with ourselves.

- Kanye West (in Jesus Walks 2004)

I wish Kanye the best and also hope that Jesus does walk with him just as he had hoped before.

B.o.B aka BOBBY RAY:

B.o.B presents The Adventures of Bobby Ray (2010)

With the rap game and mainstream music flooded with auto-tuned club-bangers, B.o.B has brought a refreshing vibe of what hip-hop used to sound like. My peers have compared him to Andre 3000 of Outkast and Ludacris. I confidently agree. B.o.B’s album B.o.B Presents: The Adventures of Bobby Ray shows true talent compared to the music out right now. He collaborates with musicians and artists outside of hip-hop while staying true to its roots. He sings ballads, plays instruments, and can even be “‘hood” when he wants being from Atlanta and all.

I’ve been telling my friends that B.o.B is exactly what the game needs. His release into the music world struck a nerve in me as it was the same sensation and relief I felt when Kanye first arrived on the scene. However, knowing what has happened to Kanye so far, I fear what may become of B.o.B.

You can listen to his album and read his lyrics at his official site.

But look it’s plain to see
Aint nothing in this game gon’ be changing me
I’ma always be B – o to the B me me

-B.o.B (in Fame)

B.o.B is among the few artistic inspirations in my life right now.

I’ve looked up to a lot of people in my life, placing them on pedestals. Eventually, they fell, and if they haven’t fallen yet, they soon will one way or another.

LESSON LEARNED: Stop putting people on pedestals. They probably wouldn’t want to be on one anyway, and if they did, that should be a huge RED FLAG about their character.

People, materials, and situations will let you down in life, heroes and all. Does this give us an excuse to pre-judge or assume the worst in them? No way. Think about all the times people have given you another chance after screwing up BIG TIME. Remember how embarrassed and humbled you felt? It’s ok.

Despite our upbringing and inspirations, we all fall down.

NOW GET UP.

This is what it means to be human.

Pass it on.

What’s your inspiration? What’s your expression outlet? You are the product of creativity and purpose. Continue the cycle by being creative and purposeful.

Here’s a poem I wrote about how our passions have been instilled in us and are supposed to make us who we are meant to be when we express them and live them out. God knows our hearts.

Written October 2008.
Expressed April 25, 2010.

inspired by the phrase “Sing us a song, and we’ll sing it back to you.” by Paramore

Ok so it looks like I’m a little “Hayley Crazy,” BUT I only used this video for innocents’ sake. I’ll admit it’s a great and possibly timeless melody, which may land itself among Journey’s Don’t Stop Believing, Bon Jovi’s Livin’ On a Prayer, or any other karaoke party anthem out there.   The original arrangement by Lady Gaga is a smash-hit, people-mover.  There’s also the slower ballad cover by 30 Seconds to Mars, that gives Bad Romance a very dark and adult (yes, more adult than Gaga’s lyrically speaking) vibe.

So I slipped past the melody, looked at the lyrics, and then wiki’ed the meaning of the song on Wikipedia.com.  There you can find a quote by Lady Gaga from an interview with MTV. About the song, she states:

What I’m really trying to say is I want the deepest, darkest, sickest parts of you that you are afraid to share with anyone because I love you that much.

While I generally don’t agree with Lady Gaga’s ways, this time I may see eye-to-eye with The Fame Monster (Let’s hope this monster only has two eyes).

I’ve seen toooooooooooooo many (romantic) relationships ruined because one person thinks they can change the other. “You should do this…you should do that…should…should…should….”

I’m guilty of this. I’ve played both the victim and the suspect at one point, and have found out that it’s not as beneficial as I thought it would be. Nobody wants to be controlled, but everyone wants to control.

So where does the change come in?  Compromise, sacrifice, and selflessness must be realized and put into practice. Just like in any team situation, the goal is to be successful as a team, not as an individual. If a relationship is to be successful, those involved need to come to a clear understanding of where the relationship is going, and make self-adjustments and self-improvements from there. Change for the sake of the common goal (i.e. marriage and life together). Live by example and not just by words. To do this without trying to change each other is difficult, but highly recommended. Relationships and romance are a learning process. Never stop learning.

This so called “bad romance” can be something beautiful.

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

Hebrews Chapter 11

1 a : allegiance to duty or a person : loyalty b (1) : fidelity to one’s promises (2) : sincerity of intentions
2 a (1) : belief and trust in and loyalty to God (2) : belief in the traditional doctrines of a religion b (1) : firm belief in something for which there is no proof (2) : complete trust
3 : something that is believed especially with strong conviction; especially : a system of religious beliefs <the Protestant faith>

Merriam-Webster Dictionary

We think we know what faith is, but we usually just make up our own definition for words that have been around for a while. The definitions above are a couple of the most credible and consistent definitions for “faith” known to us.

In regards to Faith vs Fantasy, recently I was listening to a song called Brick By Boring Brick (BBBB) by a popular band named Paramore.  At first, I didn’t understand the song, causing me to not really agree with what was being said. So I researched what lead singer Hayley Williams wrote in her published journal explaining what the song is about:

“I believe it’s important to stay young at heart. To have faith in what might seem impossible and to have goals beyond your current ambitions or temporary means. However, there is a huge difference, to me anyways, between acknowledging your dreams and never living in reality. Some people are so scared of being boring- so insecure with who they might be- that they build up this huge lie, it’s all one big distraction. For not only the on-lookers but for their self. To me, it is a selfish way to live. A great means of defense. But selfish nonetheless. I’ve been hurt by this lifestyle. Hurt by people I barely know. I’ve even been guilty of living this way. It’s so common. I’m glad that I’ve found some words to finally speak up about it.

A brick is such a traditional, tired and plain boring representation of solidity. I wanted the whole song to have this sort of fairy tale vibe… only to twist the point I’m trying to make in the song which is, ‘Stop living in a fake fairytale… like, WAKE UP!’ When thinking how I could really get that across in the song I decided I’d use a house. Someone’s safe place, even in a fairy tale… you can’t forge a refuge out of magic & fairy dust. You gotta build it just as real and as solid as a stupid old brick.”

What really won me over were the lyrics to the bridge that I guess just “clicked” one day:

If it’s not real
You can’t hold it in your hand
You can’t feel it with your heart
And I won’t believe it
But if it’s true
You can see it with your eyes
Or even in the dark

WOW. That’s when I realized that it’s in agreement with the definitions above. So there’s a difference between faith and fantasy.  This message needs to be heard.

Here’s Paramore making sure it’s heard:

Intimately: